Conflict or even differences of opinion are often automatically considered exclusively negative. The education system and how we are raised certainly play a part in this. We have learned that disputes 'spoil' relationships and so we prefer to keep quiet and avoid them.
What other reasons usually lead us to do this?
- We don't have enough experience and training in dispute resolution.
- We try to avoid the emotional intensity that dispute resolution entails.
- We don't have the courage to take responsibility for resolving our own dispute.
- We hope that leaving the decision to someone else will make the decision more objective.
- We are afraid that the resolution process will also expose our mistakes and we cannot cope with that.
Practice, start with small steps
We avoid what we fear, and we fear what we have no experience with. There is nothing easier than trying out the dispute resolution process with Disputio, in the anonymous environment of an online chat platform. It is chat only where you do not need to face direct confrontation and you will be help by empathetic people who will walk you through the whole process.
Do you know of an important pending dispute in your life, but are afraid to open it up or think the other party would not be interested in this type of resolution? Start practicing with Disputio on simpler problems:
- Are you arguing at home about who should walk the dog?
- Do you and your friends have a dispute about how to spend your holidays/leisure time?
- You have great neighbours, but their tree is ruining your lawn.
Constructively resolving the dispute without looking for a guilty party and aiming at win-lose outcome, without passing the responsibility to someone else, becomes your benefit. It will improve mutual trust and willingness to work together, and is an opportunity for growth and long-term quality relationships.